ONE TUFF SKOOL: THE HARDCORE CHRONICLES EPISODE 4 (September 28, 2009)


Recap: Unmachoman, G.I. Jokla, Chicano, and Mature Boy reached the Final Four. Chocotuna gave Estong Cold a world of hurt. But the show ended with Mann Hardly receiving a beating from an unknown assailant.

The previous episode? Click HERE: http://sydrified.blogspot.com/2009/09/one-tuff-skool-hardcore-chronicles_17.html


Show starts at the backstage area, where we can see a serious Chocotuna.

“Finally, the Great One admits his mistake” he exclaims. He tells Estong Cold that they shouldn’t be fighting. Mann Hardly is the one to blame for their problems and he is just manipulating Estong and him to turn on each other! Then Jazz comes out and was about to go to the ring when she sees Chocotuna. She asks Chocotuna if he was the one responsible for Mann’s beatdown. Chocotuna tells Jazz that he may be pissed at Mann but there are a lot of wrestlers pissed at him as well. Chocotuna then tells Jazz that since Mann is out, they could be partners for the “Love Team” belt. Chocotuna then shows of his rock hard gut. Jazz tells Chocotuna that he’s a waste of sperm.

The Hardly Boyz music bangs the arena. Jazz comes out with her usual pyro. In the ring, we see Ayatollah, Diva, and Oracle. Jazz Hardly tells everyone that at the First Blood PPV, the “Best Love Team” belt is up for grabs. The girls had a week to choose their partners. Jazz tells the girls that while the best wrestlers are battling in the number one contender’s tourney, these wrestlers might work double duty in the PPV if they choose these guys as their partners. Jazz asks Diva if she has a partner and Diva directs everyone’s attention on the big screen.

We see G.I. Jokla doing her laundry, scrubbing her house, and paying for her lunch.

Jazz asks Diva what’s this all about and Diva tells Jazz that this is how motivated G.I. Jokla is in claiming the “Love Team” belt!

Backstage we see Happy Meal and Mature Boy looking at G.I. Jokla who is currently hiding his face with a magazine.

Ayatollah is next. She tells everyone that she is Ayatollah… the IRON CHICK! She is friends with most of the girls in this match but she wants to win the belt as well. That’s why she getting the services of…

I’M A SEXY BOY!

Tsong Michaels comes out of the stage shaking everyone’s hands. Then he comes to the ring and grabs a mic. Before he could speak…

YOU THINK YOU KNOW ME?

El Chicano heads to the ring mightily pissed. He asks Tsong “What the hell”? Tsong tells Chicano that while Chicano could have a match at First Blood, he doesn’t. Tsong says that this is strictly business, and he assures Chicano… and assures Ayatollah as well. Ayatollah tells both that even though they hate her for shattering their hearts, they couldn’t resist her. Then Ayatollah asks Jazz how Mann is doing. Jazz tells them that he is fine but whoever did this must expect payback! Ayatollah then asks her how that will affect the Hardly Boyz at First Blood. Jazz tells Ayatollah that it won’t because her tag team partner will be…

HALEHLEHLHLEHLEHLEH!

The Great Pebbles comes out dancing. Ayatollah is in shock. Chicano is laughing at Tsong who’s also in shock. Pebbles comes to the ring throwing naughty smiles at Tsong who’s currently disgusted. Jazz tells Ayatollah that the Hardly Boyz have enlisted the services of Pebbles because if you think about it… he’s hardly a boy. Everyone is in shock, but then they notice Oracle. Ayatollah asks Oracle why is she silent and then Oracle predicts that her team will win “The Best Love Team” belt. She has enlisted her “brother” who is very meaty. Ayatollah asks Jazz if she knows this “brother” and Jazz tells her he’s a recently signed wrestler that she knows nothing about. Ayatollah tells Jazz that they should know this fellow because it would be unfair for them if they can’t “scout” Oracle’s brother! Jazz agrees and she puts the brother in a six-man battle royale match with Pebbles, Tsong Michaels, G.I. Jokla, Happy Meal, and Chocotuna. Jazz then tells everyone but Chicano to leave the ring because the semifinals of the Number Contender’s Match between Chicano and Mature Boy is up next! Tsong wished Chicano good luck and leaves the ring. Chicano smirks.


Match 1: Number One Contender’s Tournament – Chicano versus Mature Boy

Chicano is getting ready when…

WOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Mature Boy comes out with a bandanna and a robe. He goes to the ring where he takes off his robe to reveal his shirt. Then he tears the shirt off revealing a very “mature” body. As Mature Boy points to the crowd, Chicano is clapping.

The bell rings and Mature Boy gains quick advantage. At one moment he tries to Irish whip Chicano but Chicano reverses the whip, trips Mature Boy, and gives him a standing moonsault. Chicano attacks Mature Boy’s knees and gave the part a threshold of submission maneuvers. Then Chicano whips Mature Boy to the turnbuckle and he hits Mature Boy in the head. But all of a sudden, Mature Boy seems redeemed and he begins to hulk up. Suddenly he points at Chicano and unloads a couple of body punches. Then as Chicano stood dazed, Mature Boy calls her soccer babes and instructed them to do their routine “kick the soccer balls to Chicano’s balls”. Three soccer balls later, Chicano falls down favoring his balls. Mature Boy attempts to pin him but Chicano kicks out! Mature Boy then set Chicano up for a top-rope leg drop but he misses! Chicano then connected with a X-factor, by a spear, pins him, and wins the match!


Unmachoman looks at the monitor and tells Estong that he will win his match tonight. Unmachoman mentioned the fact that El Chicano is nothing but an unsatisfying man blocking his way to greatness. Estong told Unmacho that they should be fighting each other tonight if not for that numbskull, Chocotuna. Estong exclaimed he will get his revenge on Chocotuna! At this point, Chocotuna was tip-toeing away.


Match 2: Singles Match – Skinny Jeans versus Zankoko B. Ware

Zankoko B. Ware is just an enhancement talent that needs to earn a contract via a win. He comes out with a parrot in his shoulders and flapping his arms as if he is a bird. Then…

WHEN I WAS… A YOUNG BOY!

Skinny Jeans comes out wearing a black coat and a baseball bat. He comes to the ring and sits at the turnbuckle, pointing his bat at Zankoko B. Ware. The bell then rings but before they engage, Skinny Jeans grabs a mic. Skinny Jeans recalls his youth and tells the crowd that as a child, he would blade himself to sleep because no one would blade it for him. While kids his age would play robots, most of his toys are made of stainless steel like swiss knife, nailcutter, and scissors. He also remembers when he hugged the back of the refrigerator because he wants to feel alive. Then he cries. Zankoko B. Ware gets out of the ring… hugging his brother who is at ringside. Skinny Jeans wins by countout.


G.I. Jokla comes in to the “Hardly Headquarters” where he saw Mann in a hammock talking to The Great Pebbles to take care of Jazz. At this point, Pebbles and Jazz are looking at an Avon catalogue. Jokla asks Mann if he knows who did this to him and Mann exclaims that while he didn’t see the culprit, he’ll make sure that he will get his revenge once the investigation reveals the perpetrator. Then Mann asks Jokla why is he there and Jokla politely asks them if he could be excused from the battle royale because he will be fighting Unmachoman in the number one contender’s tournament later in the evening. Mann respectfully declines Jokla, saying that it was he who requested to participate in the “Love Team” tournament and then “politely” asks him to leave the room. Diva Tista enters and then tells Jokla that Oracle’s brother’s name is Bambam Bungalow and he is a big, red, meaty, monster! Jokla goes out worried while Pebbles looked interested.


Match 3: 6-Man elimination pinfall battle royale – Tsong Michaels versus G.I. Jokla versus The Great Pebbles (champion) versus Chocotuna versus Happy Meal versus Bambam Bungalow.

This match ends when a wrestler eliminates all of his opponents via pinfall.

The Great Pebbles enters the ring first, with his Awesome belt in his shoulders. Then G.I. Jokla comes out with a rap saying…

“Tsong is a heartbroken kid
Happy Meal looks like a kid
Pebbles might be a giant gay
But Chocotuna’s ass has Bengay
Yo, Yesyesyo! Yo, Yesyesyo!”

Crowd boos because of his awful rapping. Meanwhile… BOOYAKA, BOOYAKA! Happy Meal comes out from backstage. Then followed by Tsong Michaels… and Chocotuna.

But then… silence.

All of a sudden…

BOOM!

A huge mass of fire engulfed the stage as Bambam Bungalow enters. He is huge and he has a mask on, further hiding his big, red, meaty identity. Pebbles looks more manly at this point, as if he senses that Bambam is a challenge. After the bell rings, Jokla all of a sudden, lays down! Everyone looks disenchanted. It seems he’s asking for someone to pin him. All of a sudden everyone stomps on his prone body! He eats a choke slam from Bambam Bungalow, a skull chop from Pebbles, a springboard moonsault from Happy Meal, a superkick from Tsong and a People’s Elbow on Chocotuna. Then Tsong covers him for the elimination.

Then Estong Cold comes out to the ring with a flaming barbwire bat in tow and Chocotuna flees the ring, to the audience and out of the arena as Estong Cold chases him. While this was happening all of a sudden, the meaty Bambam tombstones Pebbles, and afterwards he choke slams the Great Pebbles and pins him, eliminates him, and throws him out of the ring! Pebbles is in shock! Bambam stares down at Pebbles. While this was happening, Tsong Michaels counters a springboard crossbody attempt from Happy Meal to lead him towards a superkick! Tsong then eliminates Happy but the celebration proved short lived as Tsong walks into a choke slam! Bambam pins Tsong and he wins the battle royale!


At the parking lot, Chocotuna is screaming like a little girl as Estong chases him with a flaming barbwire bat. Chocotuna is screaming his apologies but Estong wants nothing regarding his apologies.

Ayatollah and Diva asks Oracle how did that meaty guy became her brother. Oracle tells them that when she was little, her brother played with fire and was tortured. Ayatollah asks if Bambam’s face was burned which explains why he needs to hide his face with a mask. Oracle says that her brother was caught…

… raping a chicken.

Worse, the chicken is male.

Ayatollah quizzically looks at Oracle while Diva looks delighted.

At this point, we see G.I. Jokla helped to the locker room by the EMT’s. G.I. Jokla exclaims that he can’t wrestle in this condition. Jazz knocks on their locker area to tell Jokla that his match is next. Jokla tries to get up but falls down immediately. Ayatollah is still speechless while Diva asks Oracle if perhaps the chicken was gay.


Match 4: Number One Contender’s Tournament – Unmachoman versus G.I. Jokla

YO! YES YES YO! YO! YES YES YO!

Jokla is helped by the EMT’s who throws him to the ring. Then Jokla lies on the ring, looking at the ceiling.

I HEAR VOICES IN MY HEAD!

Unmachoman comes to the ring, looking at the prone Jokla. Then Unmacho helps Jokla up and then hits him with a RKO! Unmachoman smirks and the pins Jokla. 1… 2… KICK OUT! Unmachoman is in shock! All of a sudden Jokla comes to life. He punches and kicks and punches and kicks and punches and kicks Unmachoman! Unmachoman is down and in shock but then Jokla collapses. Everyone is in shock! Unmachoman stands up looking all confused. He taps Jokla with his foot… twice. When he isn’t moving, Unmachoman picks Jokla, presses him in the air, and slams him to the mat! He pins him and its over!

Unmachoman will face Chicano in the Finals!

Unmachoman celebrates his victory. Then he grabs a mic and tells Chicano to come out. Chicano comes out carrying a bag of leaves. Chicano asks Unmachoman why he called him up. Unmachoman says that at First Blood, he will find out why Unmachoman is the best. Chicano then asks Unmachoman why he is blabbing his mouth! When Unmachoman tried to address the question Chicano all of a sudden spears Unmachoman! Chicano tells Unmachoman that he will never become his bitch and then tells Unmacho to be prepared for First Blood!

Then Chicano gets a chair and belts Unmachoman in the head.

Chicano leaves Unmachoman in a bloody pulp.


TO BE CONTINUED NEXT WEEK!

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SYDrified Flicks: Wawa Dam!

This was shot September 23, 2009.

We were about to make a bunch of actors talk about the upcoming marathon to be held in Quezon City. Their location was this place. This was the same location used in such shows like Encantadia and Asian Treasures. The place looks extremely majestic.

I wonder how it looks like right now…


video

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"Ondoy"


In the previous post, I was trying to be funny.

But this totally kicks everything out of the window.

I realize this is no laughing matter.

My parents are in the Tandang Sora area right now. They’ll be going to the National Broadcasting Network building where they both work.

Here’s a question: Why is Tandang Sora... to Visayas Avenue... SIX HOURS!?!


No one saw this coming. Metro Manila was indeed submerged. Laguna, Bulacan, and Rizal were amongst the soaked.

Luckily, my house is flood-free. Sure, I reside in the almost-Fairview area where people hate going to our realm because it’s too far. This I hate. But I gotta love my house for being on top of a hill (it was aid that my house is situated to where Spanish, American, and Filipino soldiers fight during the 1896 to 1904 period.

Did you know that the La Mesa and Angat Dams were asked to drain their water but for some reason they didn’t pump out the excess water? This adds insult to injury. It was said that the rains we suffered today was equivalent to a month’s worth! Initially we didn’t care about the rains because it was all too normal. I never really cared about disaster things because I never thought it would happen.

So did the rest of the Manilenyos.

Look what happened.

This September 26, 2009 was the first time I called any hotline I saw on TV. I was about to visit my doctor and afterwards go to my work when what I thought was 6:30... was actually 11:30am. My mother, currently travelling with my father, called and told me that Metro Manila is drenched and they are stuck in traffic. I watched ANC and I saw Panay Avenue watered down. Minutes later, I got a call from my work buddy and he asked me to call the disaster office because my other work buddy’s house has flooded! His house is located at Munoz, Quezon City. I took out the phone book and dialled the police. They directed me to a disaster office and they happily responded to my inquiry.

I continued to watch the events that unfolded and I never thought I would see Panay, Philcoa, Batasan, Cubao, Timog, Congressional Avenue, Katipunan, Tandang Sora, Roosevelt, Araneta, and Commonwealth in that manner. Then I get a call from my neighbour. She went out and she was about to return to our subdivision but there is a big pile of water in front of our subdivision. This was no ordinary flood... it was at par with a grown man’s chest! Her husband, beside her, wanted to go home so bad that he would risk his Lite Ace to the pool of goo just to sleep beautifully in their king-sized bed. And then they saw a truck that stopped in the middle of the flood. They opted to stick to their spot and waited for the water to subside.

As of this moment, my girlfriend’s house is not underwater… but her street is submerged. To get to her house you have to pay 200 pesos so that a man with a boat… or a aerobed… or a large chunk of Styrofoam would pick you up and take you to a stroll out of no man’s land.

I recently went to Montalban, Rizal to visit the Rosalinda set and the first thing I noticed about the place is it is a mountain. Virtually a province overlooking a city, Montalban, Rizal is a collection of quarries, internet shops, nature, and resorts. So if the city succumbs to flood, then Cainta needs to worry. Cainta is one of the flattest places in the Rizal Province. The city is near Marikina and Pasig. Cainta is basically a part of Metro Manila... but in a province. So when the city was drenched, water hell ensued.

It didn’t help that it happened on a weekend. Where despite the fact that people use this day to rest, so did the government officials, some police folks, electricians, volunteers, and other help. Without the heads, all that were left were civilians.

The first time I became serious on this matter was when another neighbour called us. She is stuck in traffic and she is asking for my mother. She then wept because her sister is trapped from her house in Ampid near Batasan and San Mateo, Rizal. Her sister’s husband from Dubai called her and asked her to help her. I gladly okayed this. I called every number and hotline flashed in the TV screens and I called any disaster-oriented agency that I could see in the Yellow Pages.

I’ll often get a ring... but I’ll often get no answer.

I can’t blame them actually.

Water runs rampant all over the metro.

Who’s to blame here? PAG-ASA could predict bad weather every time but who are they to tell the residents of the greatly affected areas to abandon their homes and go to the nearest evacuation centers? Local governments couldn’t have seen this coming and just like PAG-ASA how will they force the residents of their city to relocate to another city? Maybe we should have forced all of them to work on a weekend... but fact is, that amount of water could destroy even the sturdiest of spots. Can we blame this on the MMDA? Sure, they are curing and beautifying the metro to make it up par with the other countries but Bayani Fernando is missing one important element in his innovation and that is SOIL and TREES! Hmm, come to think of it, I bet whatever the DENR will say should be remotely interesting.

But for dams may be the only man-made culprit in this matter. Had they tried to lessen the water early, then the size of the water emitted by La Mesa and Angat wouldn’t be this big.

Until now, the metro is still flooded and continuously reeling from the effects of this not-so-colossal, but seriously scary Ondoy. I don’t know when I will upload this because even my cellphone barely gets network coverage. Aside from the deaths, heavily-hit areas could suffer from that rat urine sickness, pneumonia, skin infections, and worse... starvation.

GAME OVER.

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Metro Manila Pool


Streets are impassable. Commuters are stranded. Ceilings leak. Homes are flooding.

Something’s not right.

Typhoon Ondoy zapped the sunshine that was slowly creeping in the metro. Luzon got water hell this September 26. In Metro Manila, traffic clogged the main avenues and if it didn’t probably one part of the streets just got “into deep”.

In case of emergency, contact the following Bureau of Fire Protection Numbers: 729-5166 / 410-6254 / 413-8859 / 407-1230.

The pouring rain kind of destroyed my plan to snatch a pic alongside boxing superstar Nonito Donaire. I was planning to haggle with my dad to let me borrow the camera for a tinsy moment because... well this is the only time I could get a...

Putangina!

Ehem, sorry... I just saw the images from ANC when they zeroed in on Panay Avenue and I think St. Mary’s could be underneath water right now. In Munoz, the rising flood waters just got neck-deep! Worse, the power lines have yet to be disconnected which means residents in that area fear for electrocution. Laguna is flooding while Rizal is getting deep. The only solace for commuters is the fact that the MRT stations are working for these types of problems.

Anyway, my Dad’s Vietnam trip this September 27 could also be postponed because no right flight would engage in this type of weather. I was about to go to GMA to basically shoot the stars and make them endorse the coming Quezon City International Marathon. This is a project of the QC government, which aims to make this marathon an annual meet. They have invited Kenyans and other nations to run in the event which will be from the Quezon City Memorial Circle to La Mesa Dam in Fairview. GMA is a media partner and it will prominently air the ads we made for the event. Earlier, we have been to the set of other GMA shows (mostly their dramas) and now we will also go to the different locations of GMA shows, some of which are shot outdoor. Donaire is a talent of the GMA Artist Center and is currently a contestant in Celebrity Duets. The Filipino Flash and socialite Tessa Prieto are avid health buffs. Prieto is usually seen in various fun runs in the country alongside notable runners like Drew Arellano, Suzie Abrera, Iya Villania, and Diether Ocampo who once organized a fun run which I participated (this was the infamous fun run).

If the rain keeps up, I just hope they won’t force me to shoot the late night shows.

Walang Tulugan?

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All the newscasters do this! (Sort of)

My father will fly to Vietnam this Sunday for a seminar and next month, he’ll head to China. Just like me, he’s a writer (actually he’s one of the persons I admire job-wise). The difference between me and him is that his style is more safe, technical and serious while I am suicidal, whimsical, and preposterous. He writes news stories while I think of ways to create insane commercials for a TV show (I recently found love in doing commercials for drama shows because I can make people laugh by getting the cheesiest scenes). I do news writing in my blog but I still have the flare for controversy because I am such an attention whore. He also dissed two job offers because those offers will mean that he won’t be working at the same room where my mom works as a news director.

I imagine my dad’s willingness to endure my mom and her amigas’ high-pitched voices in a serious working environment.

video

You have to admire that!


Anyway this means I am camera-less most of next month (because we all know how important it is for me to record precious moments in front of beer than my dad’s sight-seeing in Beijing)! So for those thinking that I will act like a paparazzi and shoot scenes for a website hit… no. I’ll limit my significant event-hunting to actual footages I can use.

So when I wake up this day, my dad asked me to take his picture wearing a suit. I said fine but as we look for a decent wall to take the pic, I noticed my dad is wearing suit… and shorts.

Hmmm…

(This thinking while also thinking of things I could ask as pasalubong. Video cam?)


Let’s just say all I consider important, gets exposure in my site.

And he did expose something to me that most newscasters that is seen on TV sitting down, practically does this all the time. Maybe I’ll take it as a mission to expose these fashion no-no’s.


Game starts now!

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Slice needs to Dice!


The Tenth Season of The Ultimate Fighter takes a “slice” from the dark side.

In Episode 1, UFC Prez Dana White shocked everyone by introducing Kevin Ferguson, otherwise known as “Kimbo Slice”, as a contestant.

The 35-year-old former EliteXC champ will be one of the heavyweights featured in this installment. This somewhat took out the rivalry of this season’s coaches which were Quinton “Rampage” Jackson and “Sugar” Rashad Evans. Slice was picked second pick overall by Jackson after Evans selected James McSweeney as his top pick.

Slice is a great brawler. He’s like Yogi Bear… and you stole his picnic basket…

… and Booboo.


But the main problem for 6-foot-2, 235-pounder resident from Miami, Florida is he is only a striking and he doesn’t have much of a ground game. Exciting fights could catapult awesome matches but those boring matches could be his death. Actually it will become exciting when his opponent gets him into a submission position that would likely spell the end of this former underground fighter.

Let’s just remember that no one expected Brock Lesnar to become the MMA star that he is since he is a “sports entertainment” guy. Plus, he did defeat someone via submission… but that was an exhibition match that involves former WBO boxing champ Ray Mercer.

Slice got bad rep after the internet star was destroyed fourteen seconds after the start of the match when Seth Petruzelli creamed him in one lucky blow. This match also destroyed EliteXC whose only claim to fame is having the muscle-clad and erstwhile invincible Slice in their organization.

Dana White offered a contract to Slice but he needs to earn this deal through The Ultimate Fighter. White even stated that he will make a TUF strictly for heavyweights so that Kimbo could showcase his wares.

That idea is currently a reality.

Postscript: Kimbo Slice debuts in the TUF octagon (Episode 3) against Roy Nelson. Slice’s team coached by Rampage Jackson has lost two straight duels. A win for Slice could give him more chance to secure the UFC contract.

An early loss will shatter a possible career in the UFC.

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Write-Protect

During the “olden” times, people just blog (blog, until this moment is not a recognized Microsoft Word term).

Blame Doogie Howser’s blue screen and that non-upbeat electronic music for this phenomenon!
Now, thanks to those adorable geeks, blogging just became awesome.


Sites like Multiply, Blogger, Live Journal, and MySpace are examples of numerous websites that urge patrons to cultivate on new technology. You Tube, NBA, and Crunchy Roll are some sites that has that “embed” function which gives blog owners that go signal to post their favorite clips on their hub. Hell, blogging, if used properly could be a money-making device.

Just ask the guys that developed the search engines for Yahoo and Google.

Anyway, I just got hold of what is called a live streaming traffic device (although I think the trail period should expire anytime soon). This sends stats to the blog owner of who visited the site. It tells the blog owner how this person got hold of my address (most of the visitors come via direct access), the keywords they were looking for that led to visiting my site, how the user browsed my site…

Hell, because of these contraptions I know where they are surfing, what time they were surfing, what internet provider they are hooked up to, and what are their IP addresses.

For non-geeks, IP Addresses serve as host identification and location addressing. If you watch CSI and those other crime shows, they use these addresses to decode the location of the person they are seeking.

And since we’re in the subject, I know for a fact that police investigators have the know-how to use these kinds of knowledge. When I was a reporter and my beat was checking out the different government agencies in the metro, I was once brought in to the NCRPO headquarters in Taguig where I had the luxury to check out the different police innovations they have to further clean out the evil in the streets and reduce the unsolved crimes in the country (They had a place where its filled with bloodied mannequins and the officers train their cadets to properly analyze the crime scene).

Sure, one might say that we still are way below other nation standards but they are still capable to track down easy online crackdowns particularly probing a fussy internet protocol address. In a time where danger comes in all sizes and shapes, we need to be vigilant in making sure that we have the goods to dish out a proper counterattack on foes of all sizes and shapes.

The Multiply and Friendster sites were one of the first to use the “Who’s Viewed Me” gadget. Facebook has launched it but as a widget and Twitter might welcome this development soon. So for those men who loves to log in to their Facebook (current second-most visited website in the Philippines) and Friendster (former number 2 now at the late 90’s of the Top 100 list) accounts? If you want spy on a preferred chick’s hot pics or vids, maybe it is time to do the “brave” thing and just add them in your friend’s list and ask them out…

But don’t get pissed if they ignore you.

While internet laws are still fuzzy, and lawmakers aren’t suicidal enough to back on a proper online law, at least blogging still exhibits freedom of speech of its truest and safest form.

Now who says watching Olivia Munn talking fully-clothed and not stuffing anything in her mouth is pointless?

Game Over.

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Chris Webber disses the Clippers



Chris Webber is one of the funniest guys in the planet!

Why?

Check on this!

By the way: Thanks to all ex-Clipper guys for playing. Had you not played, I wouldn’t have been laughing.

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100 Best Careers in the NBA (Part 3 of 5)


First seen at www.hoops.blink.ph.

Damn it, I must say, compiling this is hard work! You have weigh what’s good for the haters, what will make people happy, will there be any backlash, etcetera… etcetera.

Anyway, before anyone forgets, this is a BEST CAREERS IN THE NBA ranking!

Get the rules and the first installment of the rank here:
http://sydrified.blogspot.com/2009/08/100-best-careers-in-nba-part-1-of-5.html

And if you want the previous installment, check it out here:
http://sydrified.blogspot.com/2009/09/100-best-careers-in-nba-2-of-5.html

So before you ask why Grant Hill is higher than Steve Nash… or Dwyane Wade is ranked high despite still having an active career… or who the hell are Hal Greer, Neil Johnston, Bill Sharman, Tommy Heinsohn and Sam Jones… you need to check these installments out!

Who had the best careers from start to finish? Check this out!


Now in terms of why defensive players rank high in the list? I am always bent to say that these guys are a notable few. Everyone when tasked can score 20 points a night but if they only get 2 rebounds and 2 assists, I’ll pass them up as one-dimensional players. The players likely in the top ten like Michael Jordan, Hakeem Olajuwon, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Magic Johnson, David Robinson, and Shaquille O Neal are excellent scoring threats but even more powerful defenders (I gave you a bunch of names that may or may not land in the top ten… ha!).

In order to see the positive and negative aspects of the name’s entry, the HITS and MISSES enumeration was in placed to hopefully quench those who ask for reasons.

Anyway, GAME STARTS NOW!


60 BILL WALTON (Portland Trail Blazers, San Diego/Los Angeles Clippers, Boston Celtics)
STATS:
468g – 13.3ppg, 10.5rpg, 3.4apg, 2.2bpg
ACHIEVEMENTS: MVP (1), Finals MVP (1), All-NBA Team (2), NBA All-Star (2), NBA Champion (2), Hall of Famer
HITS: He is one of the league’s most charismatic players in the 70’s. He looks like a hippie, he dresses as if he’ll be going to a disco, and his white afro is one of the most recognizable do’s in that era if you’re a NBA fan. He came from a very powerful college where under John Wooden, Walton piloted UCLA to back-to-back-to-back championships which led to him being called as the greatest college player ever (he won NCAA College Player of the Year thrice in his four years, with Christian Laettner rivaling the feat in the 90’s). In the NBA, he was out to win, claiming two wins in the course of his career with Portland and Boston. He was a gifted rebounder, an able defender, and a powerful blocker.
MISSES: Hmmm… Walton while great had one of the most unfortunate careers in the NBA. He was often injured and he barely played a season where performed in at least 75 games (although he did play in 80 of Boston’s 82 games in 1985). After winning the championship, Walton battled with the Blazers office for having crappy amenities for their injured stars when he got injured and did not play in the 1978-79 NBA Season. San Diego was a poor pit stop for the curly one and while getting temporary career resurrection in Boston, he was not the focal point of the offense. This is one of the factors why his stats are this low. Think of him as Alonzo Mourning-like… minus the offensive production.
EXTRA POINTS: You’ll often hear his voice as the hyperbole-heavy broadcaster during NBA games. Did you know he was once known for his stuttering?


59 BILLY CUNNINGHAM (Philadelphia 76ers)
STATS:
654g – 20.8ppg, 10.1rpg, 4.0apg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (4), NBA All-Star (4), NBA Champion (1), Hall of Famer
HITS: Dubbed as the Kangaroo Kid for his unbelievable leaping ability, he could scour rebounds despite playing the shooting guard/ small forward role. He is tied with Michael Jordan for having the most points scored in a losing playoff game with 50 (Jordan holds the record when the Bulls played Boston and he erupted for 63). He assumed top dog rule when Chamberlain left, leading the Sixers in points and in rebounds in a very consistent basis.
MISSES: Like John Havlicek, he started his NBA career off the bench. Then Sixers coach Dolph Schayes thought of the idea of Cunningham playing point. The Kangaroo Kid was uncomfortable with the spot as this restricted his athleticism and gave him the starting SG/SF spot. This would translate to him helping the Sixers win the 1967 championship. Also Cunningham had a somewhat brief career in the NBA. This all started when contract disputes forced team leader Wilt Chamberlain to head to the Lakers. While playing his whole NBA career with Philly, Cunningham bolted to the Carolina Cougars of the ABA in 1972 where he won a MVP. Two years later he returned to the Sixers to resume his career but injuries sidelined him. He missed 52 games in with a clogged liver in Carolina and when he returned he was forced to retire for having a torn ACL (back then it was not treatable). Also when he did return to the Sixers, Philly went from contenders to rebuilders (This was a couple of years before Julius Erving signed with the Sixers).
EXTRA POINTS: After leading the Sixers to the crown as a player in 1967, he led the Sixers anew in 1983 – guiding the team to a 65-17 finish and a championship.


58 DIKEMBE MUTOMBO (Denver Nuggets, Atlanta Hawks, Philadelphia 76ers, New Jersey Nets, Houston Rockets)
STATS:
1198g – 9.8ppg, 10.3rpg, 1.0apg, 2.7bpg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (3), NBA All-Star (8), Defensive Player of the Year (4)
HITS: He has one of the world’s most recognizable smiles and has one of basketball’s most popular trademarks. Why is he high on this list? He owns four Defensive Player of the Year titles! No shot is safe if he’s lurking below the basket. Expect him to wag the finger if you didn’t see his seven foot exterior manning the lanes! Whether its help defense or face-to-face coverage, Mount Mutombo Is poised to put a lid on the rim! This is why guys like Jordan, Malone, Kobe, Barkley, and Shaq all love to give this guy a facial. First of all, this is for their poster… another thing? Most of the time, this is merely for revenge.
MISSES: The Terror from Zaire is an overlord in defense. However, he lacks the moves to conquer defense. This is the reason why team owners can’t put faith on Mutombo to build people around him. Mostly in his later years, he was acquired for the main purpose of trying to limit Shaq. This also cemented his journeyman status. While he was one of the rare players that played in the league despite being over 40, his numbers dwindled dramatically during these stints.


57 ALONZO MOURNING (Charlotte Hornets, Miami Heat, New Jersey Nets)
STATS:
838g – 17.1ppg, 8.5rpg, 1.1apg, 2.8bpg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (2), NBA All-Star (7), All-Star MVP (1), Defensive Player of the Year (2), NBA Champion (1)
HITS: He was the second overall pick in the 1993 Draft after Shaquille O’Neal. While he averaged 20 points and 9 rebounds as a rookie, he always gets overshadowed by Shaq. In Charlotte while there was in fighting between Zo and Larry Johnson, they managed to make the Hornets a East darkhorse. He then traded to Miami for sharpshooter Glen Rice where he joined another superstar, Tim Hardaway. In the late 90’s he’ll renew his rivalry with Larry Johnson but this time through the super rivalry called Miami versus New York. He is an awesome defender that also has offensive arsenal. At one point he was called the best center in the East.
MISSES: Zo’s kidney burst all chances for him to have a superstar end in his career. At one point, he almost finished his career early. When he returned from the injury, he was reduced to a second stringer, often spelling rest for Shaq. Except for his blocks, this stint decreased his career scoring and rebounding averages.


56 HAL GREER (Syracuse Nationals/ Philadelphia 76ers)
STATS:
1122g – 19.2ppg, 5.0rpg, 4.0apg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (7), NBA All-Star (10), All-Star MVP (1), NBA Champion (1), Hall of Famer
HITS: Before the Sixers played in Philly, Philly’s team was called Warriors. When the Syracuse Nationals left for Philly, the Warriors moved in the Bay Area. Hal Greer was one of the Nats that went to the Sixers during the relocation. He was once called as the third best guard in the 60’s behind Oscar Robertson and Jerry West. When Warrior Wilt Chamberlain returned to Philly as a Sixer, Wilt became the focal point of Greer’s passes. Greer is a scorer and passer and with Wilt coming in, he had found the missing ingredients for a championship. In 1967, the Sixers ousted Boston and went on to win the finals.
MISSES: It’s a given that Greer wouldn’t have won that title if Chamberlain wasn’t his teammate. When “The Stilt” left, the Sixers dropped downwards. His last season in the league was a disaster. He retired in 1973 and in that season the Sixers just won nine games. Media called the team “Philadelphia nine and 73ers”.
EXTRA POINTS: Greer had one of the most effective but most awkward free throw shots in NBA history. He sinks a free throw via a jump shot.


55 TOMMY HEINSOHN (Boston Celtics)
STATS:
654g – 18.6ppg, 8.8rpg, 2.0apg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (4), NBA All-Star (6), Rookie of the Year (1957), NBA Champion (8), Hall of Famer
HITS: Aside from Red Auerbach, Bill Russell, Bob Cousy and John Havlicek, Heinsohn ranks as one of the most beloved Boston players of all-time. He is the only player who has the distinction of being involved one way or the other in each of the Celtics’ championships (as player, coach and commentator). As a player, he won eight NBA titles in nine years. He played forward-center for Boston. He is a burly rough-houser on defensive but prefers finesse during offense. He also loves to instill work ethic and hustle to players. This motivation laid the foundation of his two NBA crowns during his coaching tenure in the 70’s.
MISSES: At 6’7 he gets rebounds because opponents set their sights on Bill Russell. Often he merely blends in the spotlight whenever Cousy, Russell, Bill Sherman, or Sam Jones gets hot. Other than that, I see Tommy Gun as a great cog for Boston’s winning run. If I could think of another flaw in his game, I’ll probably say that given that the games then were black and white… his legs were TOO white.
EXTRA POINTS: Heinsohn played college ball at Holy Cross University. This was the same school where Bob Cousy played. The day Bob Cousy retired, Tommy Heinsohn scored his 10,000th point.


54 STEVE NASH (Dallas Mavericks, Phoenix Suns)
STATS:
934g – 14.4ppg, 3.0rpg, 8.0apg, 0.8spg
ACHIEVEMENTS: MVP (2), All-NBA Team (6), NBA All-Star (6)
HITS: He is not a scoring monster but he is great playmaker, ball-handler, and three-point shooter. His passes are spell-binding. His free-wheeling game is pretty much similar to how a football game is being played. He is only one of eight players to win back-to-back MVP’s. He is a highly-intelligent player that loves to make his teammates look good. A perfect example of this is how Shawn Marion’s numbers dipped when he was traded away from Phoenix. His mastery of knowing his teammates’ strengths is awesome.
MISSES: His first stint with Phoenix was a dud, as he played barely 11 minutes and could only produce 3.3ppg. His first four years in the league he averaged under ten points. This is basically one of the reasons why this two-time MVP is ranked too low. But perspective-wise, it’s hard to imagine a two-time MVP that hasn’t had any Finals appearance. While he deserved his first MVP, critics pan at his second. In what could have been his third MVP, Nash played awesome. Unfortunately, the fact that he is not a champion doomed his chances. Despite a stellar 2006-07 NBA season, Dirk Nowitzki won the honor.


53 GRANT HILL (Detroit Pistons, Orlando Magic, Phoenix Suns)
STATS:
787g – 18.5ppg, 6.6rpg, 4.7apg, 1.4spg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (5), NBA All-Star (7), Rookie of the Year (1995)
HITS: Grant Hill drinks Sprite? Grant Hill… drinks… Sprite. He was the first of many “Jordanesque” players that the league has ever seen. He starred in Duke where he helped the team play in 3 of the 4 NCAA Finals he was affiliated with the team. He was picked third in the 1994 Draft by the Pistons to re-start Detroit’s championship run. While people thought of him as the next Mike, Hill played a lot like Scottie Pippen – he takes his normal share of points but he also gets boards and passes. In fact, he was a triple-double magnet early in his career. Detroit became a great team when he was there but he had to opt out when the supporting players in the roster got weaker. He signed with Orlando who just acquired Tracy McGrady. He will leave the Magic before the 2007 season for Phoenix.
MISSES: Injuries. Lots and lots of injuries caused Hill to miss most of his career, particularly his Orlando stint. He shouldn’t have left for Orlando. Not only did his career stagnate, Detroit would acquire Ben Wallace and Chucky Atkins. Ben Wallace was an important player in their championship while they used Atkins as a tool to acquire another vital cog in Rasheed Wallace. Hill was a very sick man and him playing for the Magic seemed like a poor fit. Even if he played without any DNP’s in Phoenix last year, re-signing for the Suns will threaten his career to not have any championships (given the state of the Lakers, Celtics, and the rest of the league.


52 WES UNSELD (Washington Bullets)
STATS:
984g – 10.8ppg, 14.0rpg, 3.9apg
ACHIEVEMENTS: MVP (1), Finals MVP (1), All-NBA Team (1), NBA All-Star (5), Rookie of the Year (1969), NBA Champion (1), Hall of Famer
HITS: He was the second player in the NBA to win Rookie of the Year and MVP honors in the same year. Known for his amazing knack to conquer rebounds, Unseld made up for his lack of size by conquering the court with his brute strength and strong determination. The guy is 6’7 and he plays center/forward! For a player who’s willing to claw his way against Dave Cowens, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Spencer Haywood, and Bob Lanier, Unseld barely felt the height difference. His bone-jarring picks and crisp, accurate outlet passes pretty much ignites a victory for the Bullets. Actually he was the key man in Washington’s championship in 1978.
MISSES: If you want a brawl, he’ll give you a brawl. However, the only thing missing in his repertoire is inside scoring. He is a feared defensive player like Dikembe Mutombo, Dennis Rodman, and Ben Wallace. If the Bullets instead relied on him and not Elvin Hayes in the offensive end, his stature could have been a bit better.
EXTRA POINTS: The Bullets went to the Philippines in 1978 where they faced the likes of Robert Jaworski, Ramon Fernandez, and Atoy Co. The Bullets won against the PBA All-Stars 133 to 123.


51 VINCE CARTER (Toronto Raptors, New Jersey Nets, Orlando Magic)
STATS:
777g – 23.5ppg, 5.5rpg, 4.3apg, 1.2spg, 0.8bpg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (2), NBA All-Star (8), Rookie of the Year (1999)
HITS: Remember the 2000 Sydney Olympics when he “poster”-ized 7-foot-2 French tower Frederic Weis? This is basically his bread and butter. Vince Carter, bar none is one of the most electrifying and explosive scorers of the league’s history. For players with 400 games and more, he ranks 19th in scoring average and 54th in most points scored. He is also a very decent defender and just like former North Carolina shooting guards Michael Jordan and Jerry Stackhouse, he can pile up rebounds and assists in an instant. Unlike Stackhouse though, coaches had credibility in him to be their team’s main man.
MISSES: It hurts his rep that he has yet or may not lead a team to the NBA championship. The teams he joined had the tools to claim a NBA crown but as it progress, the teams are always dismantled. Imagine if McGrady, Damon Stoudamire, and Marcus Camby played at least their first seven seasons with the Raptors or if Dikembe Mutombo, Kenyon Martin, Kerry Kittles and company still were in the squad when he, Richard Jefferson, and Jason Kidd were manning the Nets. I am not saying that he’ll be their savior. Actually thinking back, what most of those teams lack is a strong inside presence. Will Vinsanity and Dwight Howard play beautiful music together?


50 BOB LANIER (Detroit Pistons, Milwaukee Bucks)
STATS:
959g – 20.1ppg, 10.1rpg, 3.1apg, 0.8spg, 1.1bpg
ACHIEVEMENTS: NBA All-Star (8), All-Star MVP (1), Hall of Famer
HITS: The Dobber is a headache for opposing forces. He is unstoppable in the shaded area. He works best in offense and defense. At 6’10, he can make Kareem Abdul-Jabbar’s job a nightmare. He could extend his range to those mid-range side jumpers a la Hakeem Olajuwon, he could elude defenders with his pivot skills and he could electrify the crowd with his rim-rattling dunks! He came from a successful NCAA stint at St. Bonaventure which led to him being the top pick in the 1970 Draft.
MISSES: Lanier was a great player but he came to the league battling the likes of Kareem, Dave Cowens, Jack Sikma, Wes Unseld, and Elvin Hayes, among others. Then, the NBA has yet to institutionalize the All-NBA Second Team and Third Team honors. In his NBA career, he never had an All-NBA citation.


49 MAURICE STOKES (Rochester/Cincinnati Royals)
STATS:
202g – 16.4ppg, 17.3rpg, 5.3apg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (3), NBA All-Star (3), Rookie of the Year (1956), Hall of Famer
HITS: Despite playing for a mere 202 games, Stokes gained prominence because he was a seriously outstanding offense-defense player. While he lacked height, he was poised to give Neil Johnston, Dolph Schayes, and a young Bill Russell a slew of problems with his superb rebounding ability. Before Wilt Chamberlain entered, Stokes was the kid fans adored. After winning top rookie, he made the All-NBA and All-Star teams in all of his three seasons. He once grabbed 38 rebounds to average a high 16.3rpg in his rookie year. If he could move to the Sixers, Celtics, Knicks, or the Lakers, he will become a superstar.
MISSES: On March 12, 1958, Stokes drove to the basket and was knocked unconscious after receiving contact to his head. He was revived and he shrugged of the instance. Three days later, he fell ill, suffered a seizure, fell into a coma, and was left permanently paralyzed. He was diagnosed with “post-traumatic encephalopathy” which is a brain injury that damaged his motor-control center. He was 23 when it happened and he died in 1970 at age 36 despite his efforts to recover supported by former Hall of Famer, Jack Twyman. Had that head bump fail to happen, he could have been one of the best players seen by the league.


48 PAUL ARIZIN (Philadelphia Warriors)
STATS:
713g – 22.8ppg, 8.6rpg, 2.3apg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (4), NBA All-Star (10), All-Star MVP (1), NBA Champion (1), Hall of Famer
HITS: Before the Warriors headed out to California, the team first settled in Philadelphia. The team starred a one-two punch combo of Neil Johnston and this guy… Pitchin’ Paul! Undauntedly one of the biggest names in the 50’s, the Pennsylvania native played his entire NBA career with the Warriors. In his early years he played alongside Jumping Joe Fulks and before his retirement, he played with Hall of Famer Tom Gola and Wilt Chamberlain. He was extremely gifted offensively, as he would twice lead the league in scoring. In his NBA career that spanned almost 12 years (although he was absent for two years due to military service in Korea), he only scored under 20 points per game once and that was in his rookie year.
MISSES: Even if he was that generation’s LeBron James or Carmelo Anthony, games back then lack the things current players enjoy. There was no 3-point area, no shot clock, and players then weren’t trained like players now. Also, Arizin could have been a force if he didn’t retire in 1962. Surely, with him and Chamberlain on board, the Warriors would have been insanely awesome. They could have at least prevented a championship or two from the Celtics’ grasp. The reason why Arizin retired? He loved Philly so much that when the Warriors left for San Francisco (later Oakland, then Golden State), Arizin didn’t join and simply retired. Come to think of it, Arizin lived and died in Pennsylvania.


47 WALT FRAZIER (New York Knicks, Cleveland Cavaliers)
STATS:
825g – 18.9ppg, 5.9rpg, 6.1apg, 0.8spg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (6), NBA All-Star (7), All-Star MVP (1), NBA Champion (2), Hall of Famer
HITS: He is flamboyant, charismatic, and a loudmouth. Basically he’s a typical 70’s star. He would often arrive at the Madison Square Garden riding a Rolls Royce… wearing a mink coat… a broad-brimmed hat… basically he’ll wear what a modern day pimp would wear. On the court, he is a defensive mon-star. Sure, he could also score but his worth is seriously seen from his court smarts and wiliness. He would often “stage” a lazy act to all of a sudden swipe the ball as if like a blur. He is often associated as one of the all-best pointguards the NBA has ever produced.
MISSES: While he hardly did anything bad, Deron Williams and Chris Paul could stage a better career if they sustain their current state. Frazier’s number dropped when age sunk in. Injuries also caused his stint to somewhat get less than stellar. His Cleveland stint was played way past his prime.
EXTRA POINTS: He is nicknamed “Clyde”. It originated from the 1967 cops and robbers film Bonnie and Clyde. Warren Beatty’s character, Clyde Barrow, was a no-nonsense criminal who gained acclaim from his “Robin Hood-like” persona.


46 BOB MCADOO (Buffalo Braves, New York Knicks, Boston Celtics, Detroit Pistons, New Jersey Nets, Los Angeles Lakers, Philadelphia 76ers)
STATS:
852g – 22.1ppg, 9.4rpg, 2.3apg, 0.9spg, 1.3bpg
ACHIEVEMENTS: MVP (1), All-NBA Team (2), NBA All-Star (5), Rookie of the Year (1973), NBA Champion (2), Hall of Famer
HITS: He was seen as a precursor to shooting big men like Dirk, Chris Webber, and Rasheed Wallace. While he played center-forward, he had no problems in scoring long range. His perimeter scoring made him an offensive menace to his adversaries. He was the league’s scoring champion in three consecutive seasons (1973-74 to 1975-76). He is the last NBA player to average 30 points and 15 rebounds in a season.
MISSES: McAdoo was a journeyman. He played for too many struggling teams that don’t have the confidence to stick with him. A reason for this is his injuries. While he did enjoyed success with the Lakers, he was the sixth man in the team. He did find a home in Europe, where he became an MVP and was named as one of the 50 important players of the Euroleague’s history.


45 TRACY MCGRADY (Toronto Raptors, Orlando Magic, Houston Rockets)
STATS:
784g – 22.1ppg, 6.1rpg, 4.7apg, 1.3spg, 0.9bpg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (7), NBA All-Star (7)
HITS: He was once called the best High School Player in the US, he plays like a shooting guard but his size says otherwise. He owns long arms and insane athleticism that made him an instant hit among the fans. He is a major merchandizing magnet across the globe. As his career lengthens, so has his shooting touch. His style of play is often compared to George Gervin. He is a two-time scoring champion and he once scored 62 points against Washington in 2004.
MISSES: Okay, why is his rank this low? Well this could be easily answered by his two-year residence in Toronto as a second stringer. Now why is this rank any higher? Well T-Mac in his almost 13 years of NBA experience has yet to advance to the second round of the playoffs. Also he is often injured. He has yet to win any career-altering citations. And yeah, there’s a possibility that this rank will decrease if he plays injured anew.
EXTRA POINTS: Did you know that in 1997 Draft, former Chicago Bulls GM Jerry Krause thought of trading Scottie Pippen to the Vancouver Grizzles for their draft pick which was the fourth pick overall? The deal didn’t push because Michael Jordan threatened to retire. Krause would opt to choose T-Mac pick had the trade happened. McGrady was picked ninth by Toronto while the fourth pick of Vancouver turned out to be Antonio Daniels.


44 DOMINIQUE WILKINS (Atlanta Hawks, LA Clippers, Boston Celtics, San Antonio Spurs, Orlando Magic)
STATS:
1074g – 24.8ppg, 6.7rpg, 2.5apg, 1.3spg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (7), NBA All-Star (9)
HITS: A very, VERY explosive scorer, he could mash his way to the shaded area to a rim-rattling jam! This is the reason why Nique was dubbed as the Human Highlight Film. In his days with Atlanta, he never averaged less than 20 points with a high of 30.3ppg he obtained during the 1985-86 NBA Season. He is ninth in the list of all-time scorers as he basically gave the Atlanta fans something to cheer about in the 80’s. Actually, the world also cheered for him because the slam-dunk wars he had against Michael Jordan and Spud Webb which he won twice. While he was left off in the 50 Greatest Players List, he’ll likely headline the next ten for their 60th anniversary.
MISSES: The trade that sent him to the Clippers for Danny Manning was a bitter pill to swallow. Wilkins loved Hot-lanta. The Clippers had the distinction of taking early exits and winless campaigns. After that, he drifted from one league to another. He won championships in Europe but couldn’t get in to a title squad even if he will play backup to a player he’ll own in practice. Luckily Atlanta gave Wilkins an office job and retired his number… because that is his only consolation for them messing up his career.


43 PAUL PIERCE (Boston Celtics)
STATS:
813g – 22.9ppg, 6.3rpg, 3.9apg, 1.6spg
ACHIEVEMENTS: Finals MVP (1), All-NBA Team (4), NBA All-Star (7), NBA Champion (1)
HITS: Alongside Antoine Walker, the duo tried hard to relive the team’s glory days. But since Danny Ainge surfaced, Walker was traded, reacquired, and then traded again. In his career, The Truth suffered bouts of winless spells and various trade offers. Luckily with Ainge taking away Walker, Ainge gave him Ray Allen and Kevin Garnett to power the Celtics to a championship. He is currently the Celtics’ third leading scorer behind Larry Bird and John Havlicek.
MISSES: Luckily for Ainge’s entry but it was impossible for Pierce to win a championship with the pieces he was previously given. Instead of making the superstars become his deputies, Pierce also succumb to the awesome glare that is The Big Ticket.


42 DWYANE WADE (Miami Heat)
STATS:
394g – 25.2ppg, 4.9rpg, 6.7apg, 1.8spg, 1.0bpg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (4), NBA All-Star (5), NBA Champion (1)
HITS: D-Wade came to a team where their leader was Lamar Odom (haha). Owning the starting spot, he quickly found stride… especially when he led the Heat to the second round of the 2004 Playoffs. When a blockbuster trade sent Shaquille O’Neal to the Heat, he basically gave Shaq a Kobe-less title (Shaq would name Wade “Flash”). He is a heavy-scoring threat with a knack for defense. He was a constant part of the US Team that had its downs before the “Redeem Team” re-captured the gold medal in Beijing.
MISSES: He has yet to capture glory without Shaq. While it is too early for people to say about Wade’s fate, he’ll likely end up as an NBA great… if he continues to play like how he’s been playing for at least seven years tops.


41 GEORGE MIKAN (Minneapolis Lakers)
STATS:
439g – 23.1ppg, 9.5rpg, 2.8apg
ACHIEVEMENTS: All-NBA Team (6), NBA All-Star (4), All-Star MVP (1), NBA Champion (5), Hall of Famer
HITS: He is the first main event of the league. Call him the Shaquille O’Neal of the 50’s. Because of his lengthy frame, he could score at will, especially in the inside. In terms of defense, he was unstoppable as well. Back then when goaltending was legal, Mikan would often swat the shots before it could pass the ball. Actually, he would often give the hardest of fouls and play against the stingiest of defenses.
MISSES: His career was too short. Had his career made the 1960’s, his fate would have been different. Fact is though, he is always injured. His height, while important in his dominance, never suited the 6’10, 245lb beanpole. As a boy he shattered his knee so badly that he had to rest if for approximately 18 months. This injury would still haunt him in his playing career.
EXTRA POINTS: Mikan participated in one of the league’s most notorious ball games. Mikan’s Lakers lost to the Fort Wayne Pistons after the Pistons led 19-18. During those times, the shot clock has yet to be invented so until the final buzzer the score was untouched. This was the lowest-scoring game in NBA history and it forced the league to institute the shot clock. As consolation, Mikan scored 83.3% of his team’s points (15 of the Lakers’ 18 points), setting a record that could never be broken.


So we are nearing the A-listers!

Who’ll make the list? You might see the Iceman, the Web guy, a King, a Doctor, a kid, a guy that loves to freeze… maybe you have the answers… you just don’t know it yet.

Until next time.

GAME OVER!

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ONE TUFF SKOOL: THE HARDCORE CHRONICLES EPISODE 3 (September 17, 2009)


Recap: Chicano and Mature Boy advance to the Number 1 contender’s tournament. Chocotuna lost his berth to G.I. Jokla though. This week, two more seats will be filled.

The previous episode: Click here http://sydrified.blogspot.com/2009/09/one-tuff-skool-hardcore-chronicles.html

Episode starts backstage with Chocotuna looking serious. Chocotuna tells the crowd that aside from having a “dumb” name, Mann Hardly is a tyrant. Last week, he was punished for “speaking his mind”. Chocotuna begins to enumerate the various events that happened. The restarting of the Jazz-Ayatollah match to favor Jazz was the turning point and the restarting of his match against GI Jokla was the breaking point. GI Jokla didn’t deserve to be in his spot! Chocotuna tells Mann he is making a terrible mistake in making this happening possible! Chocotuna leaves after he vows revenge.

Match 1: Number One Contender’s Tournament – G.I. Jokla versus Estong Cold

GLASS BREAKS!

Estong Cold comes out walking to the ring chugging beer. He enters the ring and goes to the four corners of the turnbuckle flipping people. Then he grabs the mic. Estong Cold tells the folks at the back with a thick Chinese accent that he will finish off Jokla to advance the tournament. Then Estong sends his condolences to his friend Unmachoman because even if he wins his match against Skinny Jeans later, he’ll never become the champion. Estong ends the promo by saying “That’s the bottom line, because Estong Cold says so”!

YO YES YES YO! YO YES YES YO!

G.I. Jokla comes out with a huge pop. He salutes the audience and he walks towards the ring. Jokla raps at Estong!

You’re Chinese!
You smell like a Pekingese!
I love siopao!
But I hate you!
Yo, yes yes yo!

It was a crappy rap. G.I. Jokla goes to the ring with a swagger. But before G.I. Jokla gets to the ring, Chocotuna runs out and attacks Jokla from behind. Crowd boos. He then tosses Jokla to the ring where he continues to beat him up. Chocotuna gives G.I. Jokla a spinebuster, and then a buttock squash! Then he picks Jokla up and gives him a rock bottom! Then when Chocotuna tries to give Chocotuna the most electrifying move, the people’s buttocks, he sees Estong Cold. During this time Estong dumbfounded. Then he laughs. Chocotuna also laughs. Then Chocotuna offers Estong Cold to beat Jokla up. Estong gladly participates… despite the referee’s plea to send Chocotuna back to the back and stop Estong from doing any harm. Then as Chocotuna picks Jokla up for Estong to hit his Estong Cold Stunner finisher, the referee rings the bell. Estong is in shock while Chocotuna continues to slap Jokla’s nape. Estong has been disqualified! Estong turned white… then turned red when he realizes that it is all Chocotuna’s fault. Chocotuna has yet to realize this. When he looks at Estong, Estong was fuming. Chocotuna was dumb-founded but then he realized what has happened. He throws Jokla to Estong and quickly runs to the back! Estong picks up a chair and follows him.

Back in the ring, the ref raises G.I. Jokla’s hand. Jokla is happy, but is barely conscious.


Backstage, referees and officials stop Estong Cold from hurting Chocotuna. Estong Cold is carrying a chair and he vents out his anger to those that stand in his way. Then he sees Chocotuna trying to call the nearest vehicle to help him out of the arena! Estong runs as he attempts to catch Chocotuna’s… tricycle.

Meanwhile in a dimly-lit part of the arena, Diva Tista is standing by to interview Skinny Jeans. Skinny Jeans is sitting on the floor with an I-Pod in his ears. Diva asks what’s he listening to… and Skinny answers the soundtrack of Twilight. Skinny gives Unmachoman a message: Whenever a bus conductor tells him to get off the bus because he has no money, he is happy. Whenever his head feels heavy because he applied too much wax, he is happy. When he’s sad… he’s happy. Diva quizzically laughs.

While looking in the monitor, Unmachoman is bothered… while attaching weights to his balls. Estong storms the room seething. But this is not their room… this is Mann Hardly’s office. As Jazz offers refreshments, Estong demands for Mann to reconsider the ref’s decision. Mann says he can’t… but what he could give Estong is a match against The Great Pebbles tonight! If Estong wins, he’ll get a shot of the “Most Awesome Belt” next week! Unmachoman explains to Estong that Pebbles has a deep crush on him. Estong tells Unmachoman that he’ll work something out and accepts the match because that’s the bottom line and then he storms out! As he storms out of Mann Hardly’s office, he sees Chocotuna collecting change for the tricycle. Estong curses Chocotuna and chase begins anew!


Match 2: Chicano and Tsong Michaels versus Mature Boy and Happy Meal

This is a random match that featured the opponents of last week teaming up this week.

You think you know me?

El Chicano comes out with mixed reaction. Then Tsong Michaels comes out with a tremendous pop. Happy Meal comes out bouncing while Mature Boy slowly comes down to the ring doing the “Hulk” moves.

Tsong and Happy Meal start things off. They lock up and Tsong goes for an arm breaker but Happy does his aerial acrobatics to send Tsong to the turnbuckle. Happy connects with a turnbuckle splash to Tsong and Mature Boy tags in. Mature Boy whips Tsong to the ropes but Mature Boy misses with the big boot! Tsong then hits a springboard splash and quickly tags in Chicano. Chicano unloads on Mature Boy and drops him. Then Chicano talks dirty to the soccer belles which angered the women. Little did he know that Mature Boy has tagged the ultra-pumped Happy Meal! Happy Meal gives Chicano a barrage of kicks followed by a top-rope leg drop. Happy Meal pins Chicano but Chicano kicks out. Happy Meal then sets Chicano up for his 619 but Tsong comes in to hit an unsuspecting Sweet Chin Music! Then Mature Boy comes in and his soccer belles take out Tsong, who by this team is flanked by a dozen of girls holding him while kicking his balls! Back in the ring, Happy Meal is dazed but standing up and he doesn’t realize that Chicano is ready to hit the spear. The spear connects and its over! Tsong ang Chicano wins!


The PMS Posse are talking in their locker area. Ayatollah explains that the “Best Love Team” belt is a mixed tag belt. While they are a group, they have to fight each other since there are only four women in the roster. G.I. Jokla, currently mending the pain from the earlier beatdown, tells Oracle, Ayatollah, and Diva to hurry up and pick him because the unlucky two people would have to search for suitable partners.

The girls leave the locker room. Nobody picked G.I. Jokla. Jokla is sad.

Chicano and Tsong are happy heading to the backstage when they are greeted by Ayatollah. Ayatollah tells them that one of the two could be her partner for the “Best Love Team” belt. Deep inside Chicano and Tsong know that Ayatollah brings the best in them and whoever gets picked will form become the federation’s most invincible team. Tsong tells Ayatollah that has moved on, and exits out of the frame crying, reminiscing the dates he had with Ayatollah. Chicano tells Ayatollah that he’ll think about and then walks out. Ayatollah is smirking.


Match 3: The Great Pebbles (champion) versus Estong Cold

GLASS BREAKS!

Estong Cold comes out not minding everyone and then as he comes to the ring, he double flips everyone. Pebbles comes out dancing to the Bollywood beat and posing disgustingly in front of Estong Cold. This sickens Estong Cold gives Pebbles the finger but Pebbles takes Estong’s middle finger and puts it on his mouth. Estong is shocked and tries to wipe Pebbles’ saliva in his trunks… which excites Pebbles. Estong quickly attacks Pebbles and Pebbles strikes back by pinching Estong’s nipples. Then Estong clotheslines Pebbles who falls hard to the mat. Estong tries to punch Pebbles but Pebbles blocks it. Pebbles whips Estong to the ropes but Estong reverses this to a Lou Thesz Press! Now the press looks like Estong riding Pebbles which made Pebbles smile and Estong freak! The finish comes when Estong sets Pebbles up for the Estong Cold Stunner but Pebbles reverses this into a vice grip to the balls! Estong taps out!

Backstage, every man in the room holds their crotch areas with great disdain.


Meanwhile, Unmachoman spots Ayatollah, Oracle, and Diva and speaks to them regarding on their partner problem for the “Love Team” belt. Ayatollah tells him that she had a couple of choices and it wouldn’t be him because the last time they were partners, he punted her face! Unmachoman exclaims that it was just an accident and he won’t make the same mistake again. As proof, Unmachoman adds, they should look at how he’ll decimate Skinny Jeans. He then walks off… with the girls not believing his words.


Match 4: Number One Contender’s Tournament – Unmachoman versus Skinny Jeans

I hear voices in my head…

Unmachoman slowly walks out to the ring looking as baked as ever. Skinny Jeans comes down from the rafters with his trademark black coat and baseball mat. Then he walks to the ring with his head bowed down. When he enters the ring he grabs the mic… and sings Urbandub’s Endless, A Silent Whisper while cutting his wrists. Needless to say, his pre-match antics freaked out Unmachoman.

The fight is underway. Unmachoman with punches to Skinny but Skinny feels none of it and appears to want more. Unmachoman unloads a series of chops that have impact on Skinny but Skinny is enjoying it. Skinny then attacks him from all angles and a stinger splash after a whip to the turnbuckle sends Unmachoman down. Skinny tries for a sharpshooter but Unmachoman gets out of the hold before it was placed. Then Unmachoman quickly gives him a RKO! Unmachoman tries to pin Skinny but he is smiling. Unmachoman picks Skinny up and sends him down with a dropkick. Skinny tries to stand up but Unmachoman picks him up, lifts Skinny over his head, presses Skinny thrice and then slams him to the mat! Unmachoman pins him and its over!

Next week, Unmachoman will face G.I. Jokla while Chicano takes on Mature Boy.


Then a loud shriek was heard. Jazz Hardly comes over to an unconscious Matt Hardly. Matt Hardly is holding his leg. Credits roll.

TO BE CONTINUED.

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Our Dota Lair: Kanye feel the love tonight?


Hey! My bathroom has Wi-fi! Yes, I am typing while dumping! Am I afraid to get brown stuff on my less than two-week old laptop? No... because I am good in typing while wiping!

Yes... I am a cursed buffoon.

They say another door opens when a door closes.

Will that door have DOTA?


Anyway, Kanye Feel The Love Tonight? Damn right, Kanye West made a tool out of himself by “sabotaging” Taylor Swift’s acceptance speech by basically telling the world that Beyonce was better than her. The 19-year-old newb looked visibly shocked at the events... much like how Beyonce reacted when her name was dragged to the controversy. Beyonce did the good thing by letting Taylor Swift make her acceptance speech after she wins afterwards for her work in “Single Ladies”. Yes, the “hug” could look fake but anything that followed that K-West stunt is well... quite non-bizarre.

My sister is up in arms over the matter because this K-West wouldn’t give out chilli sauce unless asked.

Wait...

Oh, she’s talking about Kowloon West.

How could I not see this when she’s not speaking with a synthesizer!

Anyway, I was pissed at how Patrick Swayze left the world. At age 57, he has transferred to heaven. While starring with Wesley Snipes and John Leguizamo in that gay flick scarred part of my childhood, Dirty Dancing gave us those “macho dancer” moves and Ghost made women and men shape mud. He will be missed.

Okay, enough about the matters you can see from Yahoo.com. The biggest barkada news thus far is the tambayan’s shocking closure. Yes, while their PC’s are slow and troublesome, you can’t take away the fact that it was our home. Actually in that part of P. Noval, we have been cutting classes, cutting work, wasting tuition leftovers, and basically meddling on other people’s lives. That has been going on since 1998! There was a period where four internet shops flourished in that area. Now this is the first time that online satisfaction orphaned the spot.

Well I can’t say that I didn’t see this coming. I saw a lot of shops closing and this was just like the rest of them – PC’s not getting attention... less games placed... less crowds attracted... aside from the very brash signage in front of the Annie’s Place lobby, how will people go to their shop when no one notices it. While yeah, I can’t say if I am the right guy to critic on this since I now only come to the shop during Saturdays but it is near a UST gate where students go to either eat or wait for a ride that is shortcutting and it is just beside a convenience store.

Anyway, there were a lot of memories that were shaped in that area and we may never see another place like that given that some of us are nearing 30. From birthday drinking sprees, we have evolve to going to wedding functions and our Christmas shopping are spent in either toy stores or pre-infancy wears.

The budget weekend gimik we long for after a week-long of occupational bullshit needs to find a home. Problem is, is there another place in the UST area where there is a spacious spot to order pizza, smoke at the corridors, and serve as our watering hole apart from the booze and the other things that creeps the nightlife that will be greatly enhanced at this point?

To be determined.

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ONE TUFF SKOOL: THE HARDCORE CHRONICLES EPISODE 2 (SEPTEMBER 8, 2009)

Recap: Pebbles wins the right to fight for the Most Awesome Belt and wins it against Unmachoman in an inferno winner-take-all match!

Part 1? Click here: http://sydrified.blogspot.com/2009/09/hardcore-chronicles-episode-1-september.html

While I have yet to make visuals for this, I did make a captivating video (My apologies if I violated the Philippine Violators).

video

Word.


Starting things off, Mann Hardly, accompanied by Jazz Hardly, is now in the ring to tell the roster that there would be a tournament to face The Great Pebbles for his most awesome belt! The finals will be played in a PPV that will happen in three weeks time and it is amply called First Blood. Also, there will be a “Best Love Team” belt. This is for the best male and female team in the roster as well as a woman’s title! Back to the number one contender, here are the match-ups:

Bracket 1 will feature:
Chicano, the second runner-up versus Tsong Michaels, the third man eliminated and
Happy Meal versus Mature Boy

Bracket 2 will feature:
Unmachoman, the runner-up will face Skinny Jeans, the second man eliminated and
Estong Cold versus Chocotuna


Bracket 1 will fight tonight while Bracket 2 will fight next week. Then, G.I. Jokla with the Pretty Mean Street Posse heads to the ring. Jokla asks why he is not in the tournament… via a rap.

Yo… yes yes yo.
Yo… yes yes yo.
Why I am not in the tournament?
Or I will make you my ornament!
Yo… yes yes yo.

Diva quizzically claps while Oracle and Ayatollah hides their faces. Mann tells Jokla that he was the first one eliminated in the tournament so that means he does not deserve to be in the tournament. Jokla tells Mann that it was just a fluke. Mann tells Jokla he needs to be careful next time. Not unless there’s a guy in the tournament dumb enough to cross the boss, he will have no chance of entering the tourney. Jokla then calls Mann bias… which was seconded by Ayatollah after she thought she “won” her match last week against Jazz. Mann tries to explain the reason but…

If you smeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeellllllllllllllllllllllllllll!

Chocotuna comes out. He tells the crowd that finally Chocotuna has come back… to this god-forsaken garbage land! Crowd boos. Choco looks at the girls and tells them they need an alphamale in their group… like him and not some poser like Jokla. Jokla fumes with anger… then he raps.

Yo… yes yes y…

IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOU RAP!

Choco tells him that if he doesn’t stop talking, he’ll take his head, spin it sideways, and put it on his candy ass where the only ones that could hear him are his intestines! Jokla seethes in anger. Then Chocotuna tells Mann how stupid he is for just sitting there and controlling the people! He then calls Mann a roody poo jabroni.

Mann tells Ayatollah that she’ll get her rematch… but she’ll need to find a partner that is NOT G.I. Jokla for her inter-gender match between him and Jazz. Ayatollah tells Mann she’s okay with this and she plans to never… E-E-EVEEER lose A-GAIN (Canadian accent)! But then she asks why it couldn’t be G.I. Jokla. Mann tells Ayatollah that G.I. Jokla will face Chocotuna for the right to face Estong Cold in the tourney! Crowd loves it! Jokla is happy and gives Chocotuna his “you can’t see me” hand gesture. Chocotuna throws a tantrum.


Match 1: Number One Contender’s Tournament – Happy Meal versus Mature Boy

Mature Boy comes out and we again see the soccer girls at ringside. Happy Meal comes out from under the ring. Happy Meal started the contest with high-risk maneuvers with insane quickness. Happy Meal is actually owning Mature Boy. But when Happy Meal punches Mature Boy in the head, he “hulks” up. He throws a barrage of SLOW MOVING punches! Then he whips Mature Boy to the ropes to give him a big boot which automatically led to the leg drop! Mature Boy thought of using his soccer team roster but in the last minute, he held back. Mature Boy wins!


Then The Great Pebbles comes down to the ring and tells everyone that this tournament is great and all, but the winner of this tourney will have an unfortunate end of getting ravaged by Pebbles. Mature Boy then unleashes his women’s soccer team. The Great Pebbles flees the scene because he is allergic to women before they could even hit him in the balls!

Backstage Ayatollah is seething because she couldn’t find a partner. G.I. Jokla volunteers but Ayatollah laughs at his answer and tells him to concentrate on his qualifying match. Then from afar she notices Chicano and Tsong.

Tsong tells Chicano that they were once rivals but now they are in a solid front to bury the hatchet. Chicano agrees. There are a lot of women in the world for them to get hooked on one “Jezebel”. Chicano tells Tsong that with Ayatollah gone, they can now concentrate in dominating the Federation! Tsong will forget that Chicano threw him out of the Battle Royale because he’ll pin him in the qualifying tournament. Chicano tells him that it’s every man for himself when they are in the ring and he promises to beat him. Ayatollah comes in with a fake vomit motion and tells them that this “bromance” is creeping her out. Chicano asks Ayatollah the reason she’s lurking. Ayatollah tells both that she wants one of them to help her out in her tag team match. Chicano tells Ayatollah that they are busy preparing for their match and he storms off. Tsong also exits but he is crying, reminiscing of the times when he and Ayatollah were together.

Ayatollah ransacks the room when Estong and Unmachoman appear. Estong tells Ayatollah she doesn’t need those girls to make her night right! After they help her destroy the Hardly Boyz she’ll probably thank them by coming with them for a drink! Unmachoman flexes his muscles and Ayatollah smiles.


Match 2: Number One Contender’s Tournament – Chicano versus Tsong Michaels

Tsong tries to shake Chicano’s hand but Chicano smiles and slaps it away. Tsong smirks as we go underway! Chicano gets an upper hand early by dishing out power moves. Then Tsong bounces back and compiles a hit list of high-flying maneuvers! Then Chicano evades a superkick attempt with a DDT. As Tsong tries to wake up, Chicano exposes a turnbuckle. Unbeknownst to Chicano, Tsong kips up and superkicks him! He covers Chicano! 1… 2… kick out! Tsong sets him up for another superkick but as he attempts it, Chicano dodges it, Irish whips him to the exposed turnbuckle that Tsong Michaels eats! A spear later and Chicano wins. Chicano celebrates as Tsong is looking devastated. Chicano offers a handshake. Tsong looks dejected but still shakes Chicano’s hand.


Chicano will face Mature Boy in the semis!

Chocotuna is interviewed by Diva Tista and tells the world that Mann Hardly is a tyrant. Unfortunately for Mann, he doesn’t believe in being a teacher’s pet. He is the people’s champion. He is the most electrifying man in sports entertainment! And Mann is just a waste of sperm! Chocotuna takes the mic and tells Diva to listen as the people chant his name! The crowd goes “Yucky, Yucky, Yucky”! Chocotuna shouts “ENOUGH”! Chocotuna tells Jokla to be prepared because he’ll make sure he’ll make his ugly face ven uglier. Mann suddenly comes out, heading to the ring. He then tells Chocotuna he has heard enough and he has made the qualifying match a NO DISQUALIFICATION MATCH! Chocotuna is in shock… then he becomes livid!


Match 3: Mixed Tag Match – The Hardly Boyz versus Ayatollah and Unmachoman (w/ Estong Cold)

Before the match starts, we see Skinny Jeans looking at the action through the rafters. He has an I-Pod in his ear and a blade on his hand.

Ayatollah leads the team with Estong having a beer in his hand and Unmachoman showing off his “awesome” body. The Hardly Boyz come out with a huge ovation! Unmachoman and Mann start the match with Unmachoman getting the upper hand. Frequent tags to Ayatollah gives them a rightful advantage. Then Ayatollah misses a Lionsault attempt which prompts Mann to tag Jazz in. Then all four participants crowd the ring. Unmachoman sets Mann Hardly for a punt in the head but Mann evades the punt and then hits Ayatollah. Then Jazz climbs the top rope to unleash a swanton bomb. Estong tries to interfere in favor of Unmachoman but Mann takes out both men! The Hardly Boyz win!


Ayatollah heads to the backstage holding his head while Unmachoman and Estong Cold argue. Ayatollah looks at her side and she sees Chicano and Tsong Michaels grinning. Ayatollah shrieks and leaves. Then Unmachoman and Estong Cold stare down on the duo and walks off.


Match 4: Number One Contender’s Tournament Qualifier – Chocotuna versus G.I. Jokla (NO DQ MATCH)

Chocotuna comes out first. As he poses to the crowd, G.I. Jokla comes out. Chocotuna attacks Jokla as he poses to the crowd. He lays waste of Jokla in the corner by giving him a series of punches. Jokla finally gets offense by throwing him outside and beating him up with a chair. Then when Jokla is charging Chocotuna hits a spinebuster out of nowhere. Chocotuna rolls Jokla back to the ring and sets him up to a People’s Elbow-like maneuver… but instead of an elbow drop it is a buttock drop! It connects and Chocotuna pins Jokla… could only get a two-count. Then Jokla comes to life and hits a swinging neckbreaker and a 5-Knuckle Shuffle! Then as Jokla goes for the FU, Chocotuna reverses the FU into a rock bottom! Chocotuna scores a pinfall but Jokla has his foot on the ropes. As Chocotuna celebrates on the win, Mann Hardly comes out and orders the match to restart! Chocotuna asks Mann why and Mann tells Chocotuna that the ref gave him a quick count. Then he shows the replay… it looked normal but Mann says that the ref made a fast count. Chocotuna is pissed! He then asked for a microphone but before he could get it, the ref restarts the match and all of a sudden, Jokla whacks Chocotuna nine times in the head with a CHAIR! Jokla then successfully pins Chocotuna and it is all OVER!

G.I. Jokla celebrates the win as he bumped off Chocotuna from the tournament! Chocotuna at this point is lying wasted in the middle of the ring. Mann is grinning devilishly.


TO BE CONTINUED NEXT WEEK!

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Tara Doon sa patay-sINDIE: Da Underground Bands Peek - FMD


Because I need to write something quick (and a preview article is one of the fastest ways to write a blog read) here is a music patch up courtesy of You Tube!

I haven’t been into a gig since I held my birthday at Purple Haze (formerly in Tomas Morato near E. Rodriguez avenue) last 2008. Afterwards it became a smut bar, a fine dining house, and I think it became a dance school (?)

Anyway, thanks to Jorge, I saw a bunch of bands. I had been to the bar thrice (one when I first saw the crowd, then Jorge’s final gig at Haze, and lastly during my birthday), where back then, every first Friday of the month, Big Time Tado’s roster of indie rockers surface! I think I heard Wake Up Your Seatmate (or yeah… did I hear them when Jorge was doing something icky in Magnet Katipunan), but I certainly remember listening to Live Tilapia, Jeepney Joyride, Cover Me Quick, and this band here where Good Old Curly Top was an axeman… FMD.



FMD is a honest-to-goodness hardcore indie band that combines parodies with comic compositions. Their vocalist is named Isko, who in a way has the size and the theatrics of Jack Black. Had Jorge not left the group and stayed in Manila, Purple Haze could still be alive today (I heard rumors that the owner got married and decided to give up the establishment but it was Jorge that said this so this could probably be a cover up).

Tado launched a new bar in front of that OTHER station but I don’t think they are coordinating volume blasts everyday since Homer’s is an “open” bar and I doubt the other network’s bigwigs would delight with somewhat middle-aged rockers blurting out their obscure pipes. On the other hand, they sell Limitado shirts here.

Anyway, try looking for them at Makati, West Triangle, or Katipunan. Aside from this, try checking out their Sharon Cuneta cover.
Game Over.

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100 Best Careers in the NBA (2 of 5)


Last time, you saw the rules and how I calculated these players. Yes, I always take in consideration the intangibles like the rebounds and the assists more than the points. Scoring is easy if you are an NBA player. However, NBA players have the ability to disrupt other NBA players in making their baskets! Most of the players here are the types that can defend and disrupt the flow of the game to make it theirs.

Game starts now!

Missed the first part? Get it here at http://sydrified.blogspot.com/2009/08/100-best-careers-in-nba-part-1-of-5.html

The rules, guidelines, and other things you need to know why I made this article and why you could dispute this can be seen in this thread.

So I’ll stop talking now so you can see the things that I wrote.

80 Ray Allen: The guy’s game is easy to watch. While he doesn’t showboat as often, his shots are extremely accurate. The 2-time All-NBA member knows when to get his teammates involved and could read his opponents thoughts to change his tactic. The 9-time All-Star is a good person… to good that the only bad thing I can say about him is that he seems to be overshadowed by the rest of the league. Sure, playing in Milwaukee and Seattle… he was the star. But the evidence was seriously seen in Boston when even Rajon Rondo is stealing away his spotlight and Allen… just… lets him. And yeah, in He Got Game, he starred in the Spike Lee flick alongside Denzel Washington as Jesus Shuttlesworth. He is that good, nice, polite, and yes… good.

79 Bill Sharman: While he was the only major league player to get ejected despite not playing a single baseball game (as part of the Brooklyn Dodgers), alongside Bob Cousy, they were considered as one of the greatest backcourt duos of all time. As the team’s resident shooter, Boston won four championships during his stint. He was also a 7-time All-NBA member and an 8-time All-Star… where he was once cited as an All-Star MVP.

78 Adrian Dantley: A.D. is player that could surely pile up the points. Blessed with a trigger to torment, he entered the NBA with a gold medal around his neck (this came from the 1976 Montreal Olympics). He was then drafted by the Buffalo Braves where he became the batch’s top rookie. While he played most of his years with Utah, he was basically a superstar journeyman. The 2-time All-NBA player was also a 6-time All-Star and a 2-time scoring champion. He almost won a title but he was traded by Detroit to Dallas for Mark Aguirre… a season before the Pistons won a championship.

77 Shawn Marion: Before the Matrix bounced off from team to team, he alongside Stoudemire and Steve Nash comprise the Big Three of Phoenix. Despite his lack of size, he is blessed with the ability to become productive in both forward spots. At small forward, the 2-time All-NBA player can hit the three and overpower the competition. At power forward, brings quickness, range, and unmatched rebounding ability in this spot. Like I said, his first years were great. However, his current years say otherwise. He is in his fourth team in four years. I am not sure how he’ll shrug this slump but the Matrix needs to return to his superstar status if he doesn’t want to go to the route of Penny Hardaway.

76 Walt Bellamy: In 1962 he was awarded the Rookie of the Year Award. Why? How many players could average 31.6ppg in their rookie season (Wilt Chamberlain had more with 37.6ppg). Called Big Bell, this 4-time All-Star would register career averages of 20.1ppg and 13.7rpg, listing the Chicago Packers, Chicago Zephyrs, Baltimore Bullets, Knicks, Pistons, Hawks, and New Orleans Jazz as his teams. The problem with him was he unfortunately played in the league when the only big men capable to dominate were named Bill Russell and Wilt Chamberlain. As consolation, he did win a gold medal in 1960 Rome Olympiad.

75 James Worthy: Big Game James is an awesome compliment for Magic Johnson. The “other” goggled guy (besides Kareem) frustrated a lot of foes with his finesse and wiliness. Who could ever forget his one hand fast break dunks which more or less came from his awesome defensive play! He was a key ingredient to Magic Johnson’s Showtime but he alone couldn’t bring the Lakers up top, which was evident during the early 90’s. When he retired, the former North Carolina Tar Heel owned 3 championships, won a Finals MVP Award, gaining two All-NBA citations, and starred in seven All-Star games.

74 Marques Johnson: This 5-time All-Star was the third pick overall in the 1977 Draft. He earlier led UCLA in winning the tenth and final championship of legendary coach John Wooden. Playing in the majors, he was a prolific small forward. Actually he was one of the first players to be hailed as a point-forward. He led Milwaukee to numerous division titles (when the team was still playing in the Western Conference) but he can’t seem to lead them to the NBA Finals. While you might not know him, you could have probably seen him act in such films like Wesley Snipes’ White Men Can’t Jump, Shaq and Nick Nolte’s Blue Chips, and Billy Crystal’s Forget Paris.

73 Gus Johnson: In an era where hoop stars have yet to evolve as above-the-rim players, Honeycomb was the exception to the rule. In the 60’s, this 6’6, 235-lb. power forward was a lethal scorer and a furious open court operator. He was also flamboyant, with a gold star drilled into his teeth as proof! Despite his incredible leaping ability (see Gus Johnson’s nail) the only achievements he could bring are his four All-NBA citations, five All-Star appearances, and the 1964 Rookie of the Year Award. Honeycomb was injury-prone especially in his career’s latter parts. This prompted Washington to release him before the 1972-73 NBA season after sticking with the team since 1964. He did win a championship – as an Indiana Pacer in the ABA.

72 Robert Parish: Despite NCAA’s refusal to recognize his existence (see Parish’s stint at Centenary), The Chief was hailed as one of the elite centers of all time. As part of the most dominating frontline of the 80’s, his offense and defense proved vital in making Boston 3-time champs. How did he get to Boston? The 2-time All-NBA player was given up by Golden State alongside its third pick of the 1980 Draft for the Celtics’ number one overall draft pick. The first pick turned out to be Joe Barry Carroll, one of the biggest busts in NBA history. The third pick? Well… it was Kevin McHale. While he did win another title with his stint with the Bulls, the 21-year vet’s average diminished when the 9-time All-Star stuck in the league (he also had a tenure with the Charlotte Hornets).

71 Tim Hardaway: Do you know what a UTEP-Two Step is? This is what broadcasters call Timmy H’s devastating crossover dribble! You can count a lot of flaws in his career (like failing to win a championship) but he made a lot of great things as well. At one point, he was considered the best point guard in the league. He was thrice included in a USA team but twice missed it. Dream 2 he missed due to injury and the 98’s world championships he missed because of the NBA lockout (but he was part of the 2000 Sydney Olympics). He played in five all-star games and was cited in the All-NBA Team five times (while playing for Golden State and Miami), and he is the second fastest player behind Oscar Robertson to get 5,000 points and 2,500 assists! At the end of his career, he was criticized for his discriminatory remarks against homosexuals (the John Amaechi story). He has since been a friend of the gay society.

70 Nate Thurmond: Why is he here? Well, he is the first player to record a quadruple double! While sure, unlike the 3 other players that accomplished the feat, Nate the Great acquired this with an extra five minutes… but back then, it was the first official recorded quadruple-double! Anyway, the 1964 Rookie of the Year played most of his career with the San Francisco/Golden State Warriors. His record 18 rebounds in one quarter remain unbreakable. He is known as an excellent dish man and was once hailed as one of the best screen setter in the league. While he twice had 20 points and 20 rebounds seasons, the 7-time All-Star never got a ring. He also failed to win an All-NBA citation despite his skills because he played in a position where Bill Russell and Wilt Chamberlain dominated.

69 Yao Ming: In the 70’s, a pure Asian NBA player is like a South American jiu-jitsu master – it can happen… but no. Then Wang Zhizhi graced the spotlight… followed by Bateer Mengke… but these guys are barely token players. Chairman Yao is basically the most important basketball player in Asia. His entry got Asia to love hoops. Since his entry, Asian countries evolved. Anyway, he entered the league as a top pick, but the 3-time FIBA-Asia MVP isn’t really heralded as a top find. With Steve Francis leading Houston, Yao barely gets touches. But in the course of his career, he gradually improved to the point of being a massive superstar. He is an All-NBA member five times and is a 7-time All-Star. He is an active player which means his stats could evolve but sadly, he is currently sidelined with the fear of early retirement.

68 Alex English: After Kareem Abdul-Jabbar left Milwaukee, the Bucks pinned their hopes on this young talented player from USC. Milwaukee found no use for this small forward and was sent to the Pacers where he saw his potential. However it was in Denver where he became an offensive powerhouse. His game is described as smooth and elegant. He is not a banger, he had his moments through his finesse. Before Carmelo Anthony led the Nuggets to their first Western Finals in a very, very long while, English was getting the team division titles and scoring accomplishments. In fact, he is the first player to string eight 2,000-point seasons. Yes, if you see the Denver colors in the 80’s his Number 2 is bar none one of the more popular jerseys of that era. However, like Dominique Wilkins, this 3-time All-NBA team member and 9-time All-Star drifted out of the spotlight when he was cast away from the Nuggets.

67 Dwight Howard: Stand back! Here comes the Daily Double! He is a 3-time NBA All-Star and a 3-time All-NBA member. Despite his still short stint in the majors, the Atlanta native is prepping up to one of the league’s most important players. When he was picked first, critics feared the worse on whether he’ll be a high schooler top pick a la LeBron James or a high schooler top pick a la Kwame Brown. Luckily, he was neither (but more of the LBJ success story). He is the youngest player to average a double-double in a season (he did this during his rookie year). Actually, he averaged in double-doubles every season since his NBA debut. He is the youngest player to lead the league in rebounds and blocks. He also led the Magic to their first NBA Finals… win (as the Shaq-led Magic was swept by the Houston Rockets during their first final stint). Barely 25, he’ll likely be the NBA’s future as well as the US Team’s future where he recently got a gold medal in the Beijing Games.

66 Mitch Richmond: During his prime, this 5-time All-NBA selection and 6-time All-Star is said to be one of the league’s all-time best pure shooters. After his stint with Golden State where he was one of three players scoring in 20 points and more (and was awarded Top Rookie in 1989), he was traded to Sacramento in a move that left the Warriors with… Billy Owens (Ugh). Everywhere Richmond went, his arsenal from the arc is often booming. Every team he went that is not Golden State or the LA Lakers (where he was merely a benchwarmer), were perennial doormats. When he went to a great team, he was just a seldom used guy (Richmond was the last player to hold the ball in the 2002 championship where he logged only 4 minutes in that series), and immediately retired after claiming a ring.

65 Dave Bing: He was the first well-known point guard in the NBA to have a scoring mentality. While he was effective in orchestrating, he will shoot at will when he reads the situation well, which was unusual for point guards at that time. He was well-loved by the Pistons and decades after his retirement the 7-time All-Star became the mayor of Detroit. But it seems life without Detroit was his kryptonite. When he left the Pistons his numbers sagged. While he finished his career averaging always in double digits, it was nowhere near what he had while playing for the Pistons. Also, he was one of those players that never had a taste of victory. Actually, I think he has yet to play in the NBA Finals. When he left the Bullets for the Celtics in his last season, Washington won the title despite owning a dismal 38-44 record. He was also a 3-time All-NBA player, the 1967 Rookie of the Year and the 1976 All-Star MVP.

64 Pete Maravich: In the NCAA, Pistol Pete saw action at LSU, the same college that Shaq played in. Despite not playing in his freshman year and without the benefit of the 3-point area (it has yet to be invented), Maravich averaged 44.2 in his collegiate career. He was a premiere scoring powerhouse that also translated in the NBA. He played ten years in the NBA with pit stops in Atlanta, New Orleans/Utah, and Boston. He is a 4-time All-NBA player and a 5-time All-Star. While fans love his dazzling plays, critics smear some of his antics. He is called a ball hog and his game cannot translate to a finals berth. He is often injury-prone and it is his alcohol addiction that forced his game to stagger which ultimately led to his early retirement at age 33.

63 Kevin Johnson: Are you aware that Kevin Johnson is the first Afro-American and current mayor of Sacramento, California? Anyway he started his NBA career with Cleveland in 1987 where he was seen as the person to take the starting spot away from Mark Price. Well, Price became the team’s heart and soul and KJ was sent to Phoenix. As a Sun, he saw his career skyrocket! He is a 3-time All-Star and a 5-time All-NBA Player. He is the first player to average 20 points, 10 assists, .500 FG percentage, and 2 steals in a season (Chris Paul would follow suit). He is also one of three players to average 20 points and 10 assists in three consecutive seasons (Oscar Robertson and Isiah Thomas are the other two). In short, he can score and dish out a high number of assists every game! He almost won a ring if not for the Chicago Bulls in the 1993 Finals.

62 Nate Archibald: A playground legend that could kill an opponent’s defense by passing the ball, shooting the treys, and penetrating to the basket, Tiny’s bread and butter is his blinding speed and quickness. Archibald was the only player to win the scoring and assists title in the same season. Injuries and age however resulted for his average to dwindle. Even while being part of the 1981 Boston championship team, his numbers have been dwindling. This was the key for the Celtics to look for a replacement during the Boston-LA era. The 6-time All-Star finished his career though with the Bucks, that back then was a force in the Eastern Division. But still, he is a force despite his size. He became the All-Star MVP while playing for the Celtics and he is a five-time All-NBA member.

61 Neil Johnston: He had a brief career. But in the 50’s he was the one of the dominating names in the hardwood. For eight seasons from 1951 to 1959, the 6-foot-8 Johnston was a “towering” force in the center spot. Well, Bill Russell appeared midway in the 50’s and George Mikan retired in the mid 50’s but Johnston basically played the rest of the era. He led the league in scoring thrice, was an All-NBA selection five times and was an All-Star six times. He also grabbed a rebounding title and alongside Paul Arizin and Tom Gola, they gave the city of Philadelphia a championship in 1956 (this is the Philadelphia Warriors, which were the predecessors of the Golden State Warriors). While could have played more, a serious knee injury forced Johnston to retire before the turn of the era. While people in this generation don’t know him, don’t underestimate his power… especially his ability to sink an always sure-ball right handed hook shot.

In the third installment you’ll finally get a glimpse of the MVP’s. At this point, the HIT or MISS factors will take place. “Hit” means why he is in the rankings and “Miss” meaning why they are ranked lower than what you think they should be in.

Until next time…

Game over.

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